They didn’t want it to be him, so it couldn’t be him. Why? Because they didn’t want to believe me.

Still, our church council refused to believe that this man was stalking and threatening me. Some people will only believe “perfect victims.” Victims don’t come much more “perfect” than I was in 1999. This man was close to those families.Ĥ) The death threats I received sometimes included scripture, often referenced by Christian Reconstructionists, about punishing adulteress women. Punishments like burning adulteress women. Multiple adults in the church we both attended had commented on him following me around and trying to monopolize my attention.ģ) There was a faction within our church that leaned toward Christian Reconstructionism, which meant a return to Old Testament punishments. The stories he told about his past and about his relationship with his wife weren’t consistent. I was very happy with my life at the time.Ģ) This man was in his forties, his wife had left him because of domestic violence, and he had been dealing with delusions from untreated schizophrenia. On the rare occasion I did do something serious, I was honest about it, even when being honest meant more trouble for me. I wasn’t perfect (who is?), but I was well-known in our community for evangelizing and bringing young people into the church. The objective facts of my stalking case were:ġ) I was an eighteen-year-old girl with a long-time boyfriend I’d recently gotten engaged to.

Available on Spotify, iTunes/Apple Music, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, and more.But we aren’t always reasonable when we approach these cases, are we? We aren’t just focusing on information from the case or on trends that we know tend to hold true, but we’re also bringing along our own personal experiences and biases. We're extending the table of our dialogue! Tune in bi-weekly as the Circle of Hope pastors-Rachel, Julie, and Jonny-sit down to dialogue about faith, God, Jesus, the spiritual life, and everything in between. Resist and Restore is a podcast by Circle of Hope. As always, a little Spiritual Show and Tell to end the episode: James Webb Space Telescope images, summer sunsets, stargazing, and morning pages. Also in this episode, the pastors share some talkback from the previous episode. Kristy and Jonny also talk about theological and structural failings in religious institutions that lead to abuse, and what we should be on the lookout for in our own churches. In her book and this interview, she brings to light her personal story of being stalked and abused as a teenager in the church where her father was the pastor. Interview with author Kristy Burmeister on her book Act Normal: Memoir of a Stumbling Block. If this topic is sensitive for you, feel free to skip the interview portion of the episode. *Content warning*: this episode deals with stalking and abuse in religious institutions.

Act Normal by Kristy Burmeister